This Scary Thing Called Fear


It’s been a really long time since I last blogged, and now it’s 2013! So much had happened in those past three months that I didn’t even have time to blog about them. Anyway, I hope you had a great start for 2013. 🙂

colorful 2013

For me, I had a great bonding moment with my siblings and relatives on the side of my father. We spent the first day of the year swimming! There was so much fun. It was like I was relieved of all my worries back at home and at work, because I was with my second fathers and mothers, and my siblings were there enjoying with me. Wish I could have more of that this year! Haha. Cousins were just fun to hang out with. And it was then the Lord started speaking to me. He told me what I needed to know to get this year right, on the 1st of January.

So it was fun. But I was there, afraid to learn to swim, afraid to try the BIG slides. I heard myself saying, “Hey, Keren. What’s the big deal?” Trying hard to swim, gathering all my strength just to try one slide down that colorful-yet-scary-structure at the end of the pool, I realized once again that I’ve got so much fear overcrowding my little heart.  Even fear in the small things take up so much space in my heart. God was telling me there is no way I could face 2013 with all this heavy “fear” baggage. I needed to unload them. He asked me, “Child, what are you going to do now?” Of course, other than braving myself up that big slide and learning from my youngest sister the basics of swimming (what a shame for me!), I had to do something with this scary thing called fear.

You can be sure that when God asks a question you can’t seem to answer, He will show you the answer. In the following days, He showed me that for so long I have been living a sheltered life. I grew up in a Christian family, went to a Christian school all the way from nursery to high school, had selected friends in college, and took minimal risks even during my teenage years.

It might be really cute, but at one point, being sheltered and just sleeping like a baby is boring.

Maybe it is one of the reasons He took Mama and Papa so early–so I would learn to break out of the shell, and stand on my own feet.

The answer became ice clear when I read Bishop Oriel Ballano‘s slogan for this year: No Boundaries. This was the main theme for the preaching he spoke at church on January 6. The key context was in Isaiah 43:18-19:

“Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
and streams in the wasteland.”

The message is clear. Forget the former thing. Clarify your focus. Commit yourself to God’s plan. This year, the Lord has greater things in store. He has new miracles to do, newer victories to give, and fresher tracks to lead me in. To be able to receive these, all I need to do is to let go of my fear, go beyond my personal border, and see myself fly.

This is the answer, clear and simple.

Now, I believe I can make it this year.

What about you? Are you done moving on from your failures and victories in 2012 toward a more glorious 2013? 🙂


Shelving “2” and starting anew with “3”. 😉


2 thoughts on “This Scary Thing Called Fear

    1. It’s from Psalm 86:11 and it says, “give me an undivided heart, that I may fear Your name.” You’re right. The only fear that should remain in me is the fear of the Lord. 🙂


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